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Saturday, August 02, 2008

4 Letter Profanities

He pulled away from her angrily and sat with his head in his hands as if suddenly struck with unbearable amounts of pain, when really she was the one who was hurting. He scolded her for her confession. He was lucky, but too blinded by his own ego to realize this truth.

The world and all its wonders lay at his feet. He could have anything he wanted. Or so it seemed. In this moment of rejection she caught a glimpse of his true colors. Yet she too was blind, and could not comprehend the significance of this temper tantrum. One might have thought that she had insulted him to the utmost, unforgiveably. What had she whispered in his ear that sent him into such a rage?

I love you.

She never expected a reciprocated response, yet she never expected this response either. Was she wrong? And why was it that she automatically blamed herself for his actions? He was acting out, so surely it must be because she was acting out of character. True or not, this is how he made her feel.

She interrupted his tirade to explain herself. She clarified again that she was not looking for him to reciprocate her emotions, she was just simply voicing her feelings, feelings that she had been repressing for many months now. But her words fell on deaf ears. As always, he only heard what he wanted to hear. He continued to lament his current situation and scolded her again. "Of all the words you could have said, why did you have to use those three little words." His chastisement seared into her memory forever.

When she thought she could bear no more of his tongue lashing, she pulled herself together so as not to show her discouragement, and left quietly. Never again would she speak her heart. This she vowed.

It wasn't until many years later that she found her heart tormenting her tongue to say those words again. But this time was different. Or was it? Was she willing to take that chance? Was she ready for whatever response she might get? Was she ready to be so vulnerable? Was she ready for I love you?

1 Comments:

Blogger lady be good said...

don't say it. he has to say it first. period.

1:04 PM  

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