Rage Against The Machine

Not exactly what you would call a hard core machine. More like a can opener, literally. My alarm sounded at about 3:00 PM as scheduled. My inital plan was to awaken early so that I could whip up some potato cassarole to take with me to work for dinner. But really I didn't get much further than the can of cream of mushroom soup.

When I first signed the lease to my apartment I was stone broke. Thus I saved much money eating things like Spaghetti-O's and good ole fashioned Campbell's soup. Therefore, of course, I knew that one of the first things I should invest in would be a can opener. Rachel had raved about the one that she had gotten when her and Ronald tied the knot, and thus recommended that I purchase the same one. I was even more inclined to buy it when she told me that it was electric and fairly inexpensive. I had never had an electric can opener, let alone one of my very own and thus I jumped at the opportunity. When pay day rolled around I made sure to save enough money to buy my can opener. I made the trip to Wall-Mart and scoured the aisles up and down looking for this can opener. Rachel told me it was called Gizmo. Cute. After digging around and making a mess in three aisles I finally found one. Packaged in a little canister, it was cuter than I had imagined.

I arrived home with my new can opener. I was so excited that I could barely contain myself. I ripped the bag open and tore the tape off the canister. I then ever so gently lifted the can opener out of the box and admired it from the other side of the room. It was one of the best things I ever bought. I worked like a charm, until today.

Of course, when I was crunched for time, it would decide not to work. Frustrated and mumbling profanities I slammed around the kitchen trying to get this can of soup open. I'm quite surprised now, that there was even some soup left in the can after I was done messing with it. I even turned the dang thing upside down thinking that might do the trip. Nope. I even went so far as to get the razor blade out of my tool kit and attempted to cut the top off that way. I do not recommend this technique. Finally when all was said, and still not done, I decided that I might fair best if I just broke down and did things the old fashioned way. So I went out the local grocery store and bought a manual can opener.

After standing in line for about 10 minutes at the Bi-Lo, I arrive back home at about 4:30 PM. 1 hour to get the cassarole prepared and cooked, while also getting myself dressed for work. To make this already long story short, I was not successful in getting the cassarole finished before leaving for work. Praise the Lord for McDonald's. . . . .