Southern's Belle

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Location: Cleveland, Tennessee, United States

Step behind the curtain and take a peek into the real world of nursing - uncut and uncensored!

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Pow!

I know that I have already made 2 other posts tonight, but this one is so good that I could not resist but to share it with my readers:

I suppose that I have been a little quiet tonight because every time I look at someone they are asking me, "What's wrong?" Which essentially just ticks me off because there is nothing wrong with being quiet. Of course I suppose it is a little out of the normal for me to be quiet at work (I usually have something to say about something) but there is nothing wrong with a little internal meditation, although I appreciate the concern.

Nevertheless, one of the CNA's noticed that I haven't had much to say tonight and asked me where the "pow" was? Huh? "The pow in Porawski ?"

I love it! This one's a keeper. Funny thing is that once you get to know us, any of the three of us (me and my sisters), you'll come to the realization that what Bobby said is true. We've got pow! Pow, right in the kisser!

Time For Another Song

Switchfoot is one of my favorite bands to listen to on Sabbath. So yesterday morning on my way to church I jammed out to one of their older albums, The Beautiful Letdown.

Below is one of my favorite songs. From the first time I heard it, I could relate to everything they were singing about. Really, when it comes down to it, I want more out of this life than just okay. What fun is it to settle for okay, when there is something spectacular out there just waiting for you to find it?

More Than Fine

When I wake in the morning
I want to blow into pieces
I want more than just okay, more than just okay

When I'm up with the sunshine
I want more than just a good time
I want more than just okay, more than just okay

I'm not givin' up, givin' up now
I'm not givin' up, not backing down

More than fine, more than bent on getting by
More than fine, more than just okay

When I'm lit with sunrise
I want more than just the blue skies
I want more than just okay, more than okay

More than oceans away from the dawn
More than oceans away from who we are
More than oceans, more than oceans,
More than fine

This, That, and the Other Thing

So much as happened since I last blogged that I just hope I don't forget any pertinent details. So without further ado. . . .

I'm taking dance class, and not just any dance class. The other week I received multiple calls from Steve. He left me a message informing me that he needed to ask me something, which aside from the fact that he was calling me in the first place, struck a cord of curiosity within me. I returned his call when on my first day off. It was then that he asked me if I would be interested in being his dance partner. He went on to explain that he had a friend who taught swing and his friend had offered to give him and some friends a few lessons. I accepted his offer with the exception that he call me soon with more deals about when, where, etc.

A few days later he called me with the time and place of our first lesson. He also had gone so far as to find out what kind of footwear I should bring with me for the lesson. Our first lesson was at one of his co-worker's house. She being the owner of a beautifully large house with hardwood floors made for the perfect setting. I drove to Steve's house amidst a fairly bad thunderstorm, and arrived to class soaked to the bone. Yet despite the fact that I was miserable until I dried off, I had so much fun.

Our instructor, John, later informed us that in fact we were not dancing swing but sarok (sp?) which is French for "let's rock." But as if that was not cool enough he continued and told us that the dance steps he was teaching us were the actual dance steps from the original Dirty Dancing movie! Yeah buddy! But really the icing on the cake came later in the night when we had learned all the dance moves and then I danced some free style with the instructor, who insisted all night that I had to have taken dance or ballet at some time in my life, because I was just too good to be a beginner. Funny thing is that I warned the whole class before we started. I very casually informed everyone that I can barely walk without falling on my face. I just didn't want anyone to be too surprised when I fell smack on my face. But really I was so tickled with myself that I did so well. For now I'm waiting for Steve to call me with the date for our next lesson.

Today I managed to get myself to church. I have not been in about a month and a half. I've been taking on a lot of weekend hours at the hospital which really doesn't allow me to get there. But I had about 3 tithe checks that really needed to be handed in and it bothered me so much that I was at the point that even if I was ill I was going to make it this week.

I set my alarm so that I could make it to the second service at Collegedale Community, but then when it went off I felt so tired that I reset my alarm and decided that I would make it to the third service just fine. Once awake, I opened the closet door with a sigh. I hate picking something to wear to church. I either feel under dressed or over dressed or just self conscious - is this skirt too short, is this shirt too revealing? So I just grabbed the first thing I saw which was my brown dress with the flowers on it. I had just bought some new brown Steve Maddens, the very ones that I worn for dance class, and thought those would set the outfit off and I'd look just fine.

While getting dressed my Silvias were going off. (Silvias really being a jest towards those TV psychics with the funny commercials, but we use the term at work when we have a "feeling" about something.) I had a feeling I was going to see certain people at church, people that I have not seen in a long time. But really my Silvias are something I just shrug off. I'm never really that on top of things to be right about my gut feels, or wherever the feeling is coming from.

On my way to church some man in an F150 cut in front of me without using his turn signal, which I let him know I was ticked by honking Bianca's horn, to which he flipped me off! I quickly lost any and all respect for him, said a prayer for me not to allow his ignorance to ruin my Sabbath, sped up and passed him, never looking back.

I arrived a little early so just stood in the cool of the vestibule till the previous service was over. After a few minutes of reading over the bulletin I looked to see a man walking towards me saying, in an African accent, "I think I know this lady over here. . ." To my surprise it was Dr. Gullo my A&P teacher from my Freshman year at SAU. He always calls me Patricia and gives me a hug and then a nice firm hand shake, one of the best I have ever had in my life. We laughed and chatted. I always run into him at the craziest times and places. He asked about Dolly, as most people do, and I told him that she had graduated and was still in Poland. He told me that I should learn some Poland and call her and leave her a message in Polish. He thought that was a funny idea. Silly man. But the best part is when he introduces me to his kids, whom I already know. His one daughter being, Mufassa. . .say it again! (Sorry I couldn't resist. . .)

But really the best part of the whole day was seeing LVG, which is the person that my Silvias was telling me I was going to see. As I filed into the sanctuary, there was a line filing out, and when I looked up there he was. I grabbed him and told him that I had a feeling I was going to see him, to which he responded with the question as to whether I received his text message telling me he was going to be there. I later found out that he had sent the message to the wrong phone and I never got it. Good thing my Silvias were turned on that AM!

We chatted and caught up on a number of things. Come to find out that he is leaving in January to go back to school in Canada with his girlfriend. The whole idea just breaks my heart, not merely because I never get to see him now as it is, but because I really won't get to see him if he goes that far away. But more than that is just who he is as a person. There are guys that I know who are nice, but the word "nice" is just that, nice. It is nothing special and really implies nothing special. Thus I guess what I am trying to say is that those guys who are really wonderful are just so few and far between that I can't bear to see one leave my presence. It's just such a rarity. LVG is one of those guys. Knock-your-socks-off wonderful. I just hope that the person he is with appreciates him as much as those of us who only have the privilege of being his friend.

Friday, July 07, 2006

By Popular Demand

I recently reentered the poetry scene. I have not been able to write since November of last year. But really that does not surprise me. Poetry comes to me in spurts. Once I start up again, I can usually spit out another 2 or 3 before the fire within dies down and hibernates for awhile. Time off allows for the creative juices to marinade a really great topic, which eventually will become the foundation for a really wonderful work of art.

This most recent piece just came to me and I wrote it in about 15 minutes. I suppose that is why I am not as content with it as I am some of my other works. But I have to give credit where credit is deserved. It really came from the heart.

I wasn't going to openly display this one for my readers, not only because I feel that it could use a little more work, but mostly because I feel a little uncomfortable with its origins. There are just some days that I feel absolutely miserable, as I am sure happens to most people who are willing to admit to it. Despite technology and the numerous options for contacting and communicating with people, it's just not the same as staring into the eyes of someone you know is really listening and really cares about you. I often feel this void. No one around. Nothing to fill all the empty space. Fill my rooms with things and I still feel the same way. And thus was my inspiration.

Within The Void


Silence so overwhelming
That even silence itself
Can't hear above the
Deafening siren.

Loneliness so consuming
That empty spaces
Wish personalities into
Inanimate objects.

Anything,
Anyone,
Any voice,
To fill this void.

A Favorite

I aspire to be a poet this moving. I could not resist but to share this one with you all, being that Tennyson is one of my favorite poets. Unfortunately I have yet to find a title for this one. Anyway, hope you enjoy this one as much as I do:

More things are wrought by prayer
Than this world dreams of. Wherefore let thy voice,
Rise like a fountain for me night and day.
For what are men better than sheep or goats
That nourish a blind life within the brain
If, knowing God, they lift not hands of prayer,
Both for themselves and those who call them friend?
For so the whole round earth is every way
Bound by gold chains about the feet of God.

Sir Alfred Lord Tennyson